Dear Hollie,

I am sorry to hear of the loss of your husband.  That by itself is enough to confuse your hunger and fuel-full signals.

It looks to me like you have trained your body to adapt to a very low calorie intake.  It does this by lowering your metabolism and depressing your hunger, at least temporarily.  Also your energy is likely to be low (chronic fatigue).  Your body is metabolically depressed from your years of undereating.  It will take time and courage for you to reverse this.

It is never good to force feed (unless you are anorectic and in danger of collapse).  Do not eat if you are not hungry.  Keep good food that you like from the real food list around and look at it regularily. If it looks appealing, you think it would taste good, go ahead and eat it.  Eat until you want to stop, not until you “should.”  Make sandwiches, and dishes you like and keep them in the refrigerator, ready for your hunger.  Try to think of eating like a child, with no rules, do’s or don’ts, except that you want to stay with good quality food.

It is normal to lose your appetite in a loss like you have recently had.  Don’t worry about it. It is normal and your body will adjust to this lowered intake.

When your body senses that the food supply has changed and is plentiful, your hunger will get stronger and more definite.  Your job is to pay attention to it, and eat based on hunger and fullness signals.

It sounds as if you need to eat something at night because of your medication.  Unless this is a large amount of food, it is not an issue and you don’t need to “save up” for it.

Be patient with yourself.  You have struggled for a long time with very unhealthy approaches.  There is a better way, a natural way, to eat, but you have to cooperate with your body instead of fighting it.

Sincerely,
Jean

Thanks for your reply, I’m looking forward to my hunger signals coming back, but I have a feeling it’s going to take more time than I would like.  I love that you feel you can actually lose weight just responding to the body’s signals.  I’ve been so programmed that I continually default to lower calories than I should have.

I have to say though that I have dropped a couple pounds since forcing myself to eat 1700 calories a day and now dropping back just a few calories.

Thanks again,

Hollie

Hollie,

In order to understand what your body is doing and what you need to do to get back on a healthy track, I encourage you to read How To Become Naturally Thin By Eating More and Breaking Out of Food Jail.  If you don’t get the information in these books, it is unlikely that you will be successful at breaking away from relentless controlled eating and overweight.

Sincerely,
Jean

I’m waiting for the books now, but have the gist of your diet. 

Since I was programmed by my mother since I was a toddler to eat less and take diet pills, have had anorexia, if left to my own devices I do not eat during the day, it appears I will have a much harder time than others in getting to a place I’ve never been before, eating naturally.  I’m wondering if it will work for me at all.  Have you had other cases like this?

Hollie

Please read Breaking Out of Food Jail first.  It is full of stories of people with disturbed eating and eating disorders.  You will find yourself in the book and there is definitely hope for you.

Jean